Age Cannot Wither Her...

Women always try to tame themselves as they get older, but the ones who look best are often a little wilder. Thinking about age all the time is the biggest prison women can make for themselves.- Miuccia Prada

I've procrastinated about writing on the subject of 'dressing for your age' for a while, because I think I'm the last person to offer any nuggets of wisdom. While I have a sense of my own personal style, there's been a nagging feeling lately that much of what I choose to wear is inappropriate for someone heading into middle age, that I should tone it down a bit.

But the dominant, irreverent voice in my head (the part that selects these 'inappropriate' garments!) gets cross and says 'But you love these clothes, they express who you are. Why should you compromise on that and who cares what anyone else thinks, Godammit!?'.  I bet I'm not the only woman who has this conversation with herself.

Have you ever looked at those features in magazines in which you are advised how to dress in each decade of your adult life? As the years roll on you see a parade of women in beiges and neutrals. Now this is fine if beiges and neutrals suit you and you like them, but I'm sure that if I wore them, I would simply disappear. I genuinely question whether many of the clothes sold as appropriate for older women were actually designed with the intention of making sure they vanish altogether.

Think about it - women in their 40's, 50's and 60's were the first to wear mini skirts, tie-dyed hippy t-shirts, thigh-high boots, platform shoes, bondage trousers, pixie boots, boilersuits, mohican hair-do's, black nail varnish and dresses made from bin liners (it was the 1980's, what can I say?). Unlike our mothers or grandmothers we did not spend our youth in grown-up clothes - no smart chignons or tastefully applied maquillage for us. Yes we got older and dressing with abandon inevitably gave way to clothes that we can wear to work, but the styles of our youth are still a part of us. And then we're told to wear beige.

My research for this blog has made it abundantly clear to me that there are no easy answers to our dilemma. What's 'old' to one person will be absolutely appropriate for another so I won't even attempt to hand out trite top tips - as you'll know if you've read my previous blogs I tend to avoid Fashion 'rules', preferring to mix it up a bit and have some fun.  The best advice I've seen comes from older women themselves:

• Never stop having fun
• Learn from what other women wear and how they wear it
• Don't say 'I can't wear that because of my age' - it's all about how you feel.
• Wear what you think makes you look good. The advantage of being older is having a good understanding of the colours and shapes that suit you.

There are so many fantastic blogs out there on this subject - here's a small selection that might provide inspiration.

Stylecrone

Stunning 69 year old reveals her life and style secrets.

The Invisible Woman

Writing for the Guardian, this blogger tells it like it is for the older woman who wants to look her best. 

Fabulous After 40

If it's advice and tips you're after this might be the site for you.

Advanced Style

Blogger Ari Seth Cohen's mission is to seek out and photograph older women who still manage to look extraordinary.

  

Fashion For Nerds

This gal has fun mixing up clothes and accessories to pull together outfits that are unexpected and inspiring.

Not Dressed As Lamb

Unpretentious but very stylish 'English bird' entering her forties shares her look.

Writing and researching this blog has convinced me to listen more to my 'irreverent' voice. As I get older I hope I will 'not go gentle into that good night', and MAKE's going to help me in my mission! 

They're The Rules - I Don't Make Them Up...

I once read something Trinny and Susannah wrote that made me want to spit. It was along the lines of, you should never wear a skirt that falls above the knee if you're over 40. What?? Speaking from experience, some women feel the only asset left to them after 40 is a decent pair of pins, so who are T and S to say they shouldn't be allowed to get them out from time to time?


It got me thinking about other Stupid Fashion Rules I've come across. I'm going to take them in turn and attempt to debunk them.


Horizontal stripes make you look fat.
No they don't. In fact actual academic research at New York University Psychology Department proved that they don't (vertical stripes were more likely to affect people's perception in this way). So wear your breton t shirts with pride!


Wearing black makes you look thin
I think people choose to believe this because it suits them to think it's true. Black absorbs light more than other colours so it has a camouflaging effect, making the wearer blend into the background. In my opinion it makes you look invisible, not thin. That's fine though - we all have days when we'd rather be invisible!


Women over 40 shouldn't have long hair
Er, Goldie Hawn anyone?

I know, I know - we can only aspire to look like her. But she does epitomise why you don't have to follow this rule. Some women's faces just suit longer hair whatever their age. Try not to date yourself with a 'non' style, and go for something that frames and flatters your features. And by the way, a fringe can hide wrinkles a treat!


Never wear black with brown or navy
Why not? They're all neutral colours so you can wear them with anything, including eachother. It's just a matter of mixing them in the right proportions, and using accessories to highlight and accent.

Shoes and bags should always match
I'm not even going there.


Never mix metals in your jewellery
This rule is about not mixing gold and silver together. Well how boring! With so much lovely jewellery out there why limit yourself to certain pieces? I love wearing gold, silver and copper bangles together - they look so much sparklier when worn all at once. Last summer I had some silver gladiator sandals and it never occurred to me not to wear my gold dangly earrings with them. Beware of being 'matchy matchy'!


Blue and Green Should Never Be Seen
Erm, that sentence doesn't make sense - does it mean 'should never be seen together'? Right, well although one of my personal rules is 'never wear a bikini', I do adore the print and colours on this one.

I simply don't understand the logic of this rule - blue and green go together really well - green is partly made of blue! For more flagrant blue/green rule breaching, see our Ruby Rocks Dress .


Don't wear clothes out of season
In the days when I tortured myself with aspirational women's magazines, I was forever reading articles on managing your wardrobe. Apparently we should all be packing up our clothes neatly at the end of each season and unpacking next season's. Well I have neither the time, space nor inclination to do this. In fact I love wearing stuff out of season. It's lovely to brighten things up in Winter with a colourful summery print (I just wear layers over and under them), and quite frankly a cosy knit can be just the job given our Summers. I like contrasting fabrics like wool over silk or cotton, and if like many of our customers you're a Nomads Trousers fan, they're stretchy and wide enough to wear in Winter with tights or leggings underneath.


Don't mix prints
Sometimes florals and stripes can look great together, or graphic prints with polka dots.  Have a play, experiment - you just need to be a bit careful with colours, that's all. For me, and this applies to all the rules not just this one, it's about putting pieces together and coming up with the unexpected and surprising.

Of course, you'll have preferences for one length of skirt over another, or a particular colour of jewellery - it's fine to know what suits you, but don't ever think you can't wear what you want because it's not 'allowed'! It's not about what you should or shouldn't wear, it's about whether you like it. Does it flatter you? Does it make you feel good?


The other day I was buying something in a charity shop, and I remarked to the lady behind the till (and I hear this from many of my customers too) that I wasn't sure whether it mightn't be a bit young for me. 'Just wear it with conviction!' was her reply. Now that's one Fashion Rule I think we should all live by.